"A Laugh A Minute"? That may have been the standard of the 1960s, but today we can do much better. The record over the standard five minute joke session is 12.2 laughs per minute, set by Mr Ivor Cabbage with his carefully prepared script "My Ugly Mother-In-Law's Flatulence". The ISO 43882 calibrated Humometer registered one laugh every 4.91 seconds in Ivor's August 2001 record-breaking run, ousting former record holder Able Seaman Dick Fabulone's speech "Why I Joined The Navy".