The pogo stick was originally invented by the Pope as a convenient mode of transport inside the Vatican. However, pogo based transport has recently been abolished by Vatican officials after they found it to be the primary cause for the building's subsidence over the past decade. At a live TV interview last week, the Pope slated the official's decision, and is said to be looking into alternative methods for getting about in the sizeable building. He has suggested that the skateboard may prove to be a suitable successor to the ill-fated pogo stick.

   [email redacted]