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The demise of British tennis in the Wimbledon tennis championships can be linked to the adoption of restrictions on the use of armadillo racquets. Due to the armadillos amazing ability to turn itself inside out in an instant it was possible to play hard or soft shots in a very unpredictable way. The English tennis federation deemed this unsporting and banned them, thus condemning future generations of English tennis players to failure. The covert use of carbon fibre armadillos may one day allow players to bypass this rule.
Stewart Newell
   [email redacted] 
[undated]

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