Have you ever wondered what dogs who bark at night are actually doing? Well, Samuel Morse did and discovered that dogs overcome their limted vocal range and inability to form words or other complex linguistic gymnastics and when barking at night are actually communicating with each other using a code of long and short barks. This explains why even quite simple messages such as "don't you dare piss on my lamp-post tomorrow" can take upwards of 4 hours to transmit. Morse patented this code and after the invention of the electric-telegraph rendered his oft forgotten clumber-spaniel-telegraph obsolete he turned the barks into dots and dashes and, ever the self-publicist, named the code after himself and died a weathly man.